You still have all of me...

So, I was just clicking around on my favorited pages on my window and I clicked on my blog. Last time I updated was in August. Damn...

Anyways, I am just feeling really out of my 'normal' loop right now.

1. I miss Clarion a lot and I cannot wait to go back next year.
2. I honestly miss having a boyfriend. 
3. I am always exhausted for some unknown reason. 
4. I'm getting behind on my homework.
5. I am feeling fatter and fatter by the days.

With 1, I guess that is pretty much self explanatory. Being at home is alright, but I miss my friends and my professors. I miss the atmosphere of Clarion, period.
Two, yeah. Again, self explanatory. I keep falling for guys too quickly and I always figure out that they really aren't interested in me, just either my body, boobs mostly, or they want sex. AH!! DX Anyways, I miss having that guy I can go to about anything and just talk to. Someone that I can sleep with and cuddle and just not care about the world and my own problems.
Three MIGHT be because I am working 5 days a week, 8:30-4:30. I wake up at 6:30 and then I go to bed at about 9:30/10ish. How in the hell am I still tired in the morning? Blah...
Four... Fuckin' history and political science. I am failing on my tests for history and I haven't done assignments for Political Science. I'm going to e-mail my Government teacher and say I haven't had internet for a while. Maybe that will work...?
Five. Hello, my name is Amanda and I am 5'4" and 220 lbs. I have back problems that won't go away. I keep telling myself I need to get a diet plan going. Go to the gym, watch what I eat, all that jazz. Here is the kicker though. How do I get myself to the gym when my main mode of transportation is my mother and she just wants to go home after work? I can't win on this one... Fuck.

Well, my life in a nut shell? Ha, no. More like a blog post... whatever. I just needed to vent and post something on here... Off to bed with myself. It's what I do best anymore.

I feel like an eskimo right now... >.>

Hello slippers, sweat pants, and a hoodie. I really hate it when my dad keep the AC on all the freakin' time! Rawr. But it helps him breath, so I can let it go. Haha.
So, I know I have to get on top of the other '100 Day Challenge', but my computer sucks. I am now using Firefox, so that might work. I will have to try it tomorrow...

But, update!
-I still have a job until November-ish. I am really excited because this job that I had was only for two weeks originally. Now, 'til November? Yes. :) But I have been getting different 'jobs' during the time I was there. First, I was a secretary, then I was a summer assistant, and finally, I'm working on plot books for Potter County. Yep, the whole county. Yayy working for the county/state. :)

-The whole "I'm going to grow a pair and finally ask Kris out" phase didn't work out. I figured it wouldn't, but I tried. Haha. It doesn't help though when he doesn't give you the light of day. Example- I try and talk to him, he would say, like, one word, and then walk away. Oh well.

-I am now a student at Bucks County Community College, or BCCC. YES! :D :D :D :D :D After about a month or so looking and buckling down at Community colleges, I find this one. Tuition isn't too bad, and the classes I'm taking are online. Where I live, there are like NO colleges close by me. BCCC is about 3 and a half hours away. I am taking a history class and a political science class. Hopefully, I can pass these classes, and get back to Clarion. Man, I miss Clarion, hard core.

-So, I have been talking to my one friend, Matt, a lot recently. We used to date in high school, but things didn't work out. One day, I finally told him that we should go on a date sometime. He said sure. :) We still have to figure out a date, because he is going to University of Buffalo (which is in Buffalo, NY). Needless to say, I'm pretty stoked about this. Now, I just hope I don't get too clingy via text message. I want this one to work out. :)

-I have a vlog. XD I forgot to post one on Thursday and Friday last week, but I will figure something out. I know pretty much everyone that reads this already is subscribed to my channel, so I'm not to worried. Haha!


So, ladies and gents, I'm signing off. I gotta get ready for today. I'm hanging out with some of my high school friends. FINALLY!! :D

Cuz we're young and we're broke and I can't find my coat ...

So, I know y'all are wondering, "Why in the fuck haven't you been updating your blog, Amanda?" My internet is pretty gay and all of a sudden it wouldn't load my pictures. :/ So whenever I can get interwebz at work and get Blogspot to work there, I'll be sure to update ASAP! :P

Anyways, that crazy ginger friend of mine was buggin' me to post a real post. I figured I would do so now before I actually completely forgot. Ha!

So, I have a stable job for the summer. WIN! :D It's at a place that I abso-fucking-lutely love. I work for the county, again, which is a good thing. If I keep getting my foot in the door, I might be able to find a more stable job for the rest of the year. I could totally go for that. :)

I like someone. Yep. :) I went to school with him, graduated with him, and now work with him. How awesome is life?! But, it gets more complicated. I want to actually ask him out on a date, but, ya know, I keep shutting down and I can't ask. I always plan through scenarios through my head, but whenever I actually get into a position where we are one-on-one in a room by ourselves, I make small talk and I can't ask. I keep blaming on that I don't want to make the work place awkward, *Insert awkward turtle hand signals here*, but I don't think it's that. I've liked this guy since 5th/6th grade. There is just something about him that makes me absolutely happy. He has a great personality, an amazing smile, the most beautiful blue eyes, some pretty crazy hair(almost like mine XD), a unique sense of humor, and I just figured this out recently, he is so great with kids! He used to play trombone, plays sports (cricket and used to do track), he loves animals, and... wow. :) I just wish my friends were up here in good ol' Potter County to help push me to ask.

Okay, enough of him. Well, there could be never enough of him... Ha!

This past week, our office held a Livestock and Horse overnighter. Let me tell you! That was so much fun! I was able to talk about goats, and have fun with the younger kids. I've missed working with the 4-H groups. Oo, that reminds me. I need to turn in my clearances for the office so I can actually 'officially' help with my club. I'll get that in my backpack tomorrow. :)

So, off to bed for me. Might be an early morning for me. It will be Sunday and my mom will want to get the upstairs clean, weedeat, and clean up some wheel chairs for our 4-H meeting on Monday. Oh joy... :P

День Сорока

-Day 40-
A fave hobby.

Singing. I absolutely love it. Whether it is in the shower or in a concert, it helps me think or get emotional.

Playing my drums(in this case, timpani). Everyone has told me that I rock it on the timpani. Needless to say, I absolutely love it. :)

Cooking! If I could, I would do that for a living. :D

Lastly, crafts of all sorts! Painting, sewing, coloring, gluing, drawing, picture-ing, the whole lot of it!

День Тридцать девять

-Day 39-
Something you love.

 I love nice cool summer nights where I can just sit outside and just relax...

I love knowing I have a great family, even though we don't get along all the time...

I love my friends...

Oh, and you ;) Just kiddin'!

And I love anything crafty. It helps me clear my head and makes me figure something out.

День тридцать восемь

-Day 38-
Something you hate.
Well, there are a couple of things(Like you haven't heard that before :P)

Headaches. They just suck, completely. I have to be on a prescription for them. >.<

Another thing is when people who don't fill up to their potential. I know a couple of people who do that, and they just annoy me. Just apply yourself, dammit!!

One last thing would be sunburn. I forgot how much I really did hate it until about a week ago. D:

День Тридцать семь

-Day 37-
A picture of your parents/grandparents.
This one is pretty self explanatory. :)

Parents: Kurvin and Rose Hershey. They are pretty awesome.

Grandparents(Mother Side): Dorothy and Albert Swords. Although my papaw isn't my legit grandpa, he was the only one I knew.

Grandparents (Father Side): Kurvin and Helen Hershey. They have both passed away but they will always be with me.

День Тридцать шесть

-Day 36-
Something you would like to achieve/do before you die
Well, of course there is a couple of things that I want to do before I die.

 One thing is to graduate from college. If it is for Music Education or Culinary, I want my flippin' degree.

Next is to travel. I just want to go everywhere. Ireland, Russia, Greenland, whatever! I just want to go out and see the world! :)

Another thing is have my farm again. I miss my goats hardcore and I am going to get that back! *Pounds fist*

ANOTHER thing that I want to do is build my own house. This has always been an interest of mine since I was a little girl. I blame my father. :P

The last thing that I want to accomplish is having my own family. Knowing that I could one day have a family of my own is the greatest thing.

День тридцать пять

-Day 35-
Family vacation memory.

Oh wow. Uhm. I guess the closest we have ever came to a family vacation was visiting my Gramma and Grandpa Hershey in York, PA. Our whole family never go anywhere together anymore. j

День тридцать четыре

-Day 34-
Somewhere you would like to travel to.

IRELAND!!! K, thanks. :)
I have always had a fascination for that place. To be able to go there and stay for like, a week or two, I would be so happy.

День Тридцать три

-Day 33 - Your car/dream car.

Ahhhh, yes. My dream car is a yellow(duh!) 1940's Chevrolet Truck. I've wanted this truck ever since I could remember. I mean really, look at it. How can you NOT fall in love with it? ♥ :)
Makes me mad that I couldn't find a good picture of a yellow one. *frustrated face* So I guess a 'Woodie' would fit. :D

День тридцать два

-Day 32-
Something/someone that means everything to you

Someone(s) that means everything to me are my family. They are the greatest people out there. I love them with all of my heart, and I know for a fact that if I get in a pinch, they will help me out, and I would do the same with them. ♥

Тридцать один день

-Day 31-
Your first true love. ♥

Well, this is awkward...

My first true love was Erich Petsch. I've talked about him sooo much on this blog. I can say that he was great, and all that jazz, but, he is my ex-boyfriend. Things happen for a reason I guess. Yeah, sometimes I do miss him, but more often than that, I don't. It is a great feeling actually.
Yayy being single!! :D

День Тридцать

-Day 30-
Fave tattoo/tattoo you want.
I'm still iffy on how many I want, but I have some ideas on a couple. Oh, and I have no idea where any of these are going to go either. XD

One I know that I want is this musical bird. I saw this once and was like, oh em gee! (Yes, I actually did say that when I saw it). This is in the top tattoo selection.

Another one is just an overall music staff. My seeeeeester and I were going to get this on our foot right before her wedding, but you know, she had to get all pregnant and all that jazz. :P

Another idea is an alto clef. Since I am an alto, I need to represent. :D

My last idea that I have for here are stars. I absolutely love stars! They have to be my favorite shape, ever.

Okay, there are more ideas that form in my head, but I keep thinking constantly about this. I really want one, but hey, good ideas come in time. :)

День двадцать девять

Day 29 - Your zodiac sign.

Ahh, Taurus. It might explain why I'm bullheaded :)

День двадцать восемь

-Day 28-
Celeb look-a-like. (Or if you don't have one then do a celeb you wish you could look like.)

I have never had anyone say to me that I look like some celebrity.  Personally, I don't want to look like a celeb, but if I HADD to choose someone to look like, I would choose Nicole Kidman. She is really beautiful.

День двадцать семь

-Day 27-
Something you can't leave home without.
Well, there is a couple things that I never leave my house without.

One is my wallet. You never know when you are going to need to show some ID or use some monies.

Another thing is my glasses. I kinda need those things to see. Seeing is a good thing.

ANOTHER thing I never leave without is my iPod. I always need my music. It helps me stay sane...ish.

The last thing is my phone. That is the only time I can actually use it. XD

And yes, these are the exact things that I have, including the glasses(but they are just a different color :)

День двадцать шесть

-Day 26-
A picture of you & your closest family member

It would definitely be my sister. We are basically twins but 3 1/2 years apart. :)

День двадцать пять

-Day 25-
Fave Jersey Shore cast member. (Or fave reality TV show celeb)
WA-HOO!!! One quarter of the way done! Oh, let's get to this, shall we?

I hate Jersey Shore, most def. I hardly watch reality TV to begin with, but when my English teacher went on Survivor, that changed. It was exciting seeing her on the TV, with her ukalaylee(I know, terribly spelled, but I know that I suck at spelling so it's perfectly alright.), and singing her heart out. She always did this during class, and whenever you had a birthday, she always crashed your class and would sing to you.

День двадцать четыре

-Day 24-
Fave restaurant.

I would say my favorite restaurant would be...Sweden Valley Inn. It is a bar/restauran. They have amazing food, and a great atmosphere.

День двадцать три

-Day 23-
Something that frightens you.

One that I wish wasn't true, but it seems like it is becoming more of a reality. Persons who read my blog, you will get a first taste of it now, but please, don't say anything yet. I won't be attending Clarion next fall due to crappy situations. The part that frightens me is that I won't be able to go back in the spring or even at all due to that crappy situation. It kills me because I know for a fact that I am letting so many people down. I still have to let professors know about this, and then the actual school and it will be official. Ugh, this sucks. :(

Another thing is being alone. A lot of people know what I have gone through within my college years. I don't want that to happen ever again. I want to be able to know that I will get someone that will love me for who I am.

One more thing is loosing my dad. He is really rough because of his medical history. Heart attacks, respiratory failure, and now diabetes. I get worried about him all the time. I don't know what I would really do without him.

One last thing is my own personal fear. Bees. I just really and truly hate them!

День двадцать два

-Day 22-
Fave clothing store/brand.

I absolutely loved Arizona items, but then everything started getting really holey and I just didn't like that at all.

Then I opened my eyes to Old Navy. I remember Meghan saying that she shopped there a lot and that they are real nice. So, I went and I love their jeans. :)

День двадцать первый

-Day 21-
Fave talk show host.

Oh I hardly watch talk shows, but I always did when I was younger. I would probably have to say Maury. He was pretty flippin' fantastic. :)

День двадцать

-Day 20-
Someone that makes you smile.

There is more than 1 someone that makes me smile.

The ginger chick who I call my best friend. Even when I don't want to talk to anyone, she somehow figures out to get me talking and then laughing.

Ohhh, there is also this Mexican that is just an amazing best friend as well. When it comes to random vent sessions to our picture, she knows how I tick and therefore knows how to get me to smile.

День Девятнадцать

-Day 19-
A picture of what you did today.

"Good Morning/Afternoon Penn State Extension. This is Amanda. How may I help you?"
That is what you heard all day where I worked. :) I really and truly love this job. It is so great. The atmosphere of the place is light and you can have fun. I just wish I had this job longer than 3-4 weeks. :/

Say what you mean, tell me I'm right, and let the sun rain down on me.

I posted something similar on my Tumblr (http://hereismychance.tumblr.com/) the other night, and I figured I should do so on here.

I'm starting to actually love my life. Yeah, I know that my college career might be put on hold and my education is suffering, but I have great friends and a wonderful family that care about me. I see that a lot of my friends have so many problems with their whole family and I just could never understand that. Yeah, my parents and I bicker, but we never ever have huge fights. I absolutely love them and they are so supportive of me. They know my college career is so on the edge right now, but my mom is trying her damndest to help me out with finances(well, not out of her pocket because they need the money too) and getting a job and attempting to find something to get me back. Yeah, my dad might bitch me out on occasion, I know he cares a lot. That is why hi does that to me. He doesn't want his little girl growing up. I always help him at home with miscellaneous projects that needed to get done.
My friends are always there for me. I always try to return the favor, even though it might hurt me in the end. I always try to help them out, no matter what. I love my friends. It is just in my nature to be kind and help everyone. I guess sometimes that has its downfalls, but it has gotten me to where I am today. Yeah, bumps here and holes there. It happens. It's called life. Get used to it.
I'm really glad that I have a job now too. Yeah, it is temporary, but it is something and I love it. I get along with everyone in the building and we can joke around too. Those are the types of work environments that I absolutely love. I'm just so lucky to have jobs that are like that.
Now, trying to figure out how to get a more stable job for the summer and then getting back to school. I can do this. I know it. :)

День Восемнадцать

-Day 18-
Fave Holiday.

I would say that my favorite holiday would probably be Thanksgiving. I have always loved the homeyness of the holiday. It always reminds me of my Aunt Lynn(Probably because of the Indians.) I even made some ceramic turkeys for my gramma as center pieces too :)